Santa Monica Observer - Community, Diversity, Sustainability and other Overused Words

By Amber S. Jackson
Lucky Lifer 

Mental Health Techs Sent to Prison Cells Rather than Relax Severe Lockdown Rules

Sensory deprivation is a hard thing to go through. That's why it's usually used as a punishment. Just because they say it isn't doesn't make the pain go away.

 

January 10, 2021

I sincerely wish a Happy New Year to you, Santa Monica, and beyond!! I do not let the fact that I've been on almost one month straight of 23 1/2 hours in my cell a day keep me from at least trying to have a positive and outlook and attitude.

Guys, I won't lie, I'm struggling to see positive right now. Sensory deprivation is a hard thing to go through. That's why it's usually used as a punishment. That's also why it causes PTSD and induces mental illnesses in people. I'm not the same person I was before the prison began these extended lockdowns. I feel like a piece of me dies each time my mental endurance is stretched in what adversity it can take. They just keep saying 'it's not a punishment' and that rubber stamp is supposed to make the pain go away.

Humans need sunlight regularly. They need exercise, even just walking outside for as little as 20 minutes. Daily, this can measurably improve one's health. Seeing nature, even just a little patch of grass, is enough contact with nature to improve someone's mental state. Humans were never meant to be in a box.

I go back and fourth, in and out, of bouts of depression. Sleeping all day, hoping to pass these days and wake up when this is finally over. I vow to never forget to appreciate the ability to go outside and just walk. I go back and fourth between anger and sadness. Anger that this is not at all about covid-19, but their poor reaction to it. Sadness because this 'cure' is far worse then the so-called disease. Nobody seems to care how long we're locked in these damned rooms!!

I put in a co-pay mental health request, and do you know what they do to fill this request?? They send a mental health psyche tech to my cell door!! And they wonder why I refuse to speak through my cell door.

When I see this 'Happy' new year 2021 on my TV repeatedly, all I can do is calmly wonder if this time in my life in prison is so bad because there is a blessing on the other side. That's usually how God works. I've grown a lot in 2020. I'm here with this platform talking to you, which is one of the biggest products of that growth. I've always wanted my own column, and I went after it and got it?? This would not have happened if not for covid-19! That is a fact. I would have been too busy with other activities. I plan on blogging, pod casting and having my own live radio show!! That's right! This is just the beginning. You'll be getting me on all forms of media!! This was a milestone in my life, marking my journey's beginning point into forming my personality and voice for entertainment commentary. So, I've managed to extract some form of value from this 2020 year.

You may wonder why my writing contains so much editorial commentary. Well, few people know what it's like to be in prison. Or how prisoners feel about it. So, I'm doing all I can to communicate the zeitgeist. My first and main promise is to speak in truth. That way we have a baseline standard. Then I tell you what I feel about it. No secret that my feelings color my writing. I will never be phony and pretend to be neutral. I've seen too my and been through way too much to not speak my mind. I welcome and encourage anyone and everyone to do your own research on my writings!! If someone had followed up on my state prisoner EDD fraud story, it would have been mainstream weeks earlier!! Like I said, truth.

I am looking forward to 2021. 2020 was even tougher on me than when I got this life sentence. I'm one year closer to freedom!!

Feel free to email me your comments and questions @ jpay.com Amber Jackson #X15530. Donations needed and welcomed!!

 

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